Queer pop icon Fletcher’s latest single, “Boy,” has been met with high praise from some and sharp criticism from others. Released on June 5, the country pop ballad reveals Fletcher’s new romance with a man, and the fear that came with opening up about it. I reviewed the song at face value before its release, noting the complexity and nuance of its subject matter. I can relate by experience to the difficult feelings and questions that come up for queer women in heteronormative relationships, so it didn’t initially strike me as much more than a queer person coming to terms with the fluid nature of their sexuality.
However, Fletcher’s platform has been built almost exclusively on sapphic narratives. Her fanbase, many of whom identify as lesbians, have expressed mixed feelings about “Boy.” Fans and followers are taking issue mainly with the timing of the release, the marketing strategy and the language used in both the song itself and the promotional materials surrounding it.
Most of the criticisms found in the comment sections of her promotional posts for “Boy” were about the release coming during Pride Month. Fletcher has been openly queer for several years, and her music has provided representation for femme lesbians, a historically marginalized portion of the LGBTQ+ community. But to pivot to lamenting how hard it is to reveal her heteronormative relationship feels like a betrayal for the sapphic community who makes up such a large portion of her platform. One frustrated fan wondered on TikTok, “Why release a pro-straight (as a white femme female) song during PRIDE and then make it seem like you were on a healing journey and then found men? Ugh pls…”
Of course Fletcher’s fears of not being accepted are valid, but they just don’t compare to the very real mistreatment, harassment and violence same-sex couples face just trying to exist. While I don’t believe it was Fletcher’s intention to conflate the two, bringing her universally accepted relationship to the table during a month that is dedicated to uplifting, celebrating and centering LGBTQ+ voices felt disrespectful and like a bit of a mockery. Additionally, to have the whole release set up to feel like she’s “coming out” as loving a man while the rights and freedoms of same-sex couples and trans people are actively being stripped in the United States as we speak, was tone deaf at best.
Fletcher supporters rebutted with a really valid point: Pride is for everyone; bisexuals and pansexuals included. The discourse surrounding “Boy” opens up a crucial conversation about biphobia in the LGBTQ+ community. It needs to be acknowledged that being in a heteronormative relationship does not negate one’s queerness. Bisexual and pansexual people exist and deserve visibility and representation. The LGBTQ+ community should be safe for exploring all the facets of one’s sexuality. There shouldn’t be any space for this odd rhetoric suggesting that queerness is only valid when expressed in a same-sex relationship. One Instagram user said, “It’s sad to see so much of the LGBT community be so intolerant to someone else’s sexuality.”
A similar discourse recently unfolded after Jojo Siwa shared on a Celebrity Big Brother livestream that her sexuality has changed, and she identifies more as queer than lesbian, later revealing her new relationship with Big Brother co-star Chris Hughes. Albeit, while Siwa’s controversy is multilayered with cheating allegations, both she and Fletcher are facing harsh queerbaiting accusations. I’ve been wondering whether the accusations are totally warranted or these are just a couple of women figuring out their sexuality just like all of us have or are or eventually will.
The reality is, it’s never that simple when you have a platform of millions of people, which raises another issue with Fletcher’s release of “Boy”: the marketing. Fame comes with being subjected to meticulous scrutiny, and anybody with basic media literacy skills knows to look out for a meta narrative — a story within the story — when consuming content. There are a few aspects of the rollout of the “Boy” campaign that folks are finding problematic:
- Messaging. Lyrically, verbiage like, “Sitting on a secret, hiding out where nobody knows who I was before,” denotes a sense of shame attached to Fletcher’s sapphic identity. Promotional content using words like, “an act of liberation, I cracked,” suggests that she’s evolved or transcended into this new heterosexual identity.
- Before the single’s release, Fletcher archived all of her previous content on Instagram. She said in a TikTok response to the negative feedback (which we’ll get into later) that she has always done that before releasing new music. While that may be true, within the wider context of the release, it doesn’t look right. Her older content has since been restored to her Instagram page, presumably in light of these criticisms.
- Fletcher’s TikTok response insisted that the song is not meant to center men. However, the merch for the single is just shirts and hats with “Boy” on them which, unfortunately, literally centers males.
- Aesthetically, the promotional content is beautiful. Posts have featured Fletcher running through fields of wildflowers in a pretty dress, dancing in an old farmhouse in a different pretty dress. It’s all very soft and feminine which, at face value, is fine. But once again, in the bigger story of who Fletcher has marketed herself to be for a decade now, as one commenter remarked, “This looks like a conversion camp success story.” And to zoom out even more, with conservatism and the “trad wife” aesthetic on the rise, the imagery is concerning for those who have related and identified to Fletcher’s former bold, audacious and unapologetically sapphic persona.
People are feeling concerned about how this story and its messaging may be weaponized against the LGBTQ+ community, specifically queer women. One cheeky Instagram comment sarcastically noted, “Can’t wait for my mom to show me this and ask me why I didn’t try harder with men.” It’s among the most common stereotypes of queer women that their queerness is a phase and they just haven’t found the right man yet. This is an obviously untrue, harmful rhetoric that only seems to gain traction in today’s political climate.
Between the Rolling Stone interview published on the day “Boy” came out, the TikTok response video I mentioned before, and her June 17 appearance on the podcast Made It Out with Mal Glowenke, Fletcher has had a lot to say both preceding and in response to this discourse. These were the common threads:
- Fletcher’s queerness is not a phase. She always has been and always will be queer.
- She was never fearful of revealing her relationship to the wider world. She acknowledges that it’s not hard or scary to be with a man. The fear was about the response of her community. She knew people wouldn’t be happy based on rumors and speculation circulating that she might be seeing a man since fall of 2024.
- Regarding her lyrics coming across as vilifying the queer community, she shared that the verbiage wasn’t more proud simply because she was scared. She mentioned that she has also received thousands of messages from people who have felt seen by “Boy.”
- Fletcher’s choice to release “Boy” during Pride Month was not the initial plan. A different single, “Hi Everyone, Leave Please,” was supposed to be released on May 23, but she didn’t think it would land well after being on a six-month hiatus. She figured Pride Month would be a good time to open up about a new aspect of her queer identity, but also understands that it didn’t land that way.
- In response to criticism of the rebrand’s optics and the “trad wife” aesthetic, Fletcher said, “I’m not soft for a man, [healed, or changed] by a man…Queer doesn’t have an aesthetic. It doesn’t need to look a specific way…This is just the way I want to express myself right now.”
- Expanding on the erasure of all her sapphic content on Instagram, Fletcher shared that she’s always done that before releasing new music. She also revealed that she had planned to restore all of her content from the last decade in celebration of 10 years making music.
- While Fletcher stands by her music, she acknowledged that there wasn’t enough context to help listeners understand the full message of the song and album. In her words, “I’m sorry to my fans and to the people who felt so blindsided. I think that I could have let people more into my world, but I also didn’t really know how. I’m still kinda figuring that out.”
Phew. That is a LOT of information, but where does it leave us? I’m still not sure people got the answers they were looking for, in spite of all Fletcher has said. I’m a big believer in “impact over intent,” and nine times out of ten I would say just own that you messed up. However, this feels a little more complicated than that. Was the rollout rough and poorly thought out? Absolutely. Is the marketing jarring and uncomfortable in the context of Fletcher’s history and today’s political climate? One hundred percent. Could her response have been better? Yes. Do folks have a right to be upset? Of course.
On the other hand, is biphobia a critical issue in the queer community? Yes. Are some of the comments attacking Fletcher’s character over the top? Yes. Do public figures deserve the same grace the rest of us do when navigating something as complex and daunting as figuring out their sexuality? They do. It’s up to each individual to decide whether they believe Fletcher when she says all she wants is for people to feel safe showing up as their authentic selves. Personally, I do believe her.
This has all struck me as an extreme misunderstanding on a massive scale. All of these things can be true at the same time; that’s the nature of life. I can genuinely understand both sides of the discourse, and it can still be upsetting. Part of finding peace with difficult situations is embracing the “both, and” of it all. Whether folks choose to continue supporting Fletcher or not, I do hope we can find it in ourselves to be kind, especially to people who are struggling within our LGBTQ+ community.
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