Lizzy McAlpine is older and wiser, as she tackles the complexities of a relationship held together by physical intimacy while emotionally yearning for someone else on “Pushing It Down and Praying,” the lead single off the deluxe edition of her latest studio album, Older (2024). The deluxe, Older (and Wiser), is due out Oct. 4 on streaming platforms.
Clarity can be an elusive end when wracked with guilt over your thoughts and feelings. Sometimes we must push down our feelings to save face — and we pray. In the song, “Pushing It Down and Praying,” McAlpine describes a physical relationship she is in with one person while mentally and emotionally pining for someone else (“When I close my eyes / You replace him / Wearin’ no disguise / You erase him”). She beautifully captures this duality of guilt and confusion, as she struggles with her inner desires and what this emotional betrayal could mean for her relationship.
The song takes you on an emotional rollercoaster, showcasing McAlpine’s signature blend of vulnerability and indie-pop sound. It’s not until about halfway through the track that the electric beat drops during the second verse and into the chorus, capturing the conflict between the comfort of stability and the pull toward deeper emotional fulfillment (“I wanna feel guilty / I wanna feel that it’s wrong / I wanna know peace again / Wanna sing a different song”). She yearns for a moment of clarity, while the song’s bridge envelops you into a heightened sense of reality — a tug-of-war — singing, “Softer, harder, in-between / You know just how to get to me / He is stable, you are deep / I know just how to get what I need.”
Accompanied by a music video featuring singer-songwriter Role Model, with whom McAlpine collaborated on the track “So Far Gone” from his latest record Kansas Anymore (2024), the visuals enhance the song’s messages. In the video, McAlpine stands before an audience, symbolizing how she’s putting on a “show” in her relationship.
Ultimately, McAlpine’s “Pushing It Down and Praying” struggles between seeking stability and yearning for deeper connection, but it feels like a soft punch and a soft hug at the same time.
Keep up with Lizzy McAlpine: Instagram // Spotify // X // TikTok // YouTube // Facebook // Website
